I thought I
had better come clean (come out) here as my time may have run out.
When I wrote up the
"Intro" page, I was a lot younger and more romantically inclined and
full of the inspiration for the music and for my relationship with
Dianne and what the future might bring. We shared a common interest in
Shakespeare, theatre and art. The use of a Shakespeare verse was a
romantic expression of how I was feeling about the joy of composing
music inspired by my relationship with Dianne in those days.
I thought I would have an
exciting time with the music and be able to succeed in making a living
worth the devotion, and provide Dianne and myself and my disabled
daughter, Claire, with the means for a life we have never known. I
estimated that there was enough time and that if I lived the traditional
4 score and ten years I would be happy to let go and move on to the next
world .. whatever that was to be.
So I fooled around with the
Shakespearian verse on the Intro page, and re-wrote it with a modicum of artistic license
into a verse that basically meant the same but had a inverted viewpoint.
As Shakespeare had his time of birth and death, I thought it amusing to
also put my birth but suddenly the task of making the choice of what
death year started me thinking.
I had long accepted that a
reasonable life span, and a probable life span would take me to about 70
years old. A lot of my favourite activities would probably be over a
done with by that time I laughingly thought, so I figured I liked
a little more time thank you. So I extended it to 72 years. That turned
out to be 2020
1947 to 2020 looked neat
and comfortable. But this is the scary part......
I used a technique of
Intuitive Visualization of the day of my passing and it came up as 24th
April 2020 but may have been 2022 but I thought that was stretching it
too far so I settled for 2020. Seemed too clear and it was easy to doubt. After all I was
doing this little exercise and building the webpage at around 1996.
That's when I first decided to
have a website and started teaching myself about computers. Windows
95 encouraged this idea as it was so user friendly.
But after a while I thought
it was too neat, and looking at men at that age around me, I figured I
should be able to squeeze out some more time than 2020 so I added a couple of more
years from the number "20" to the number "22" which was to me, a significant number in
Numerology, and so the story goes, I would cark it still looking pretty
handsome as it were. LOL So I settled on 2022.
My thoughts were turned to the idea that I should be
able to live up to his current age, why not live as long
as Dianne's grandmother? Ninety Two.
As a 9 year old in
Surrey Hills I met lovely old lady whom I called "Old 92" - her age at the time. She lived at
the back of the terraced house my mother was living in at Darlinghurst
in Sydney. I was visiting mum from the foster home in
Armidale for a couple of weeks during the school holidays. My Mother had
suddenly turned up in my life visiting the orphanage after so years of
forgetting I ever HAD a mother. I was living at the Ohio Boys Home from around 1958 to 1965 and so I was delighted to go down to Sydney on the
train for a holiday with the Mother I barely knew but loved so deeply.
So that is where "92" became a significant number.
The
man that hath music in himself, And is moved with concord of
sweet sounds, Is worthy of friendship, responsibility, and
success. The motions of his spirit are bright as day, And
his affections light as
Elysium. Let such a man be trusted.
